Thud is an uncompiled programming language based on rocks (also known as “sedimentary development”).
Thud is natural, organic, easy to read, and easy to write, as it consists entirely of the keyword
Thud is type safe and thread safe as
Thud has no types or threads. You may type the word
Thud in any medium regardless of physical state, with an intrinsic guarantee that each atomic
Thud cannot and will not metaphysically interact with any other
Thud has a low learning curve, regardless of language background. Most developers will be able to
Thud in as little as thirty easy lessons.
Thud is uncompiled and will not run on any computer, it has a very low memory footprint, depending on the local geographic features of the implementation site. Individual instances may be thrown at
LLVM developers, who will emit
ouch, although this is an unexpected benefit and not a result of the non-existent optimizations built into the toolchain.
Thud is static. Any
Thud errors (for example,
GastricDistress) can safely be ignored by any Thuddist developers. Type annotations are unneeded, as are
Thud debuggers or
Thud unit tests. To ensure correctness, one may throw a
Thud at a nearby barista, tax auditor, or neighborhood association chairperson, regardless of LLVM background.
Thud is inherently nullable. That which has no
not Thud. All instances are therefore automatically guaranteed for thuddability, as non-thuddable elements are
not Thud, or on every second Thursday,
Thud includes a powerful macro system for metaprogramming, consisting of leaving
Thud instances alone, as they aren’t meant to do anything in the first place.
Thuds can exist concurrently, although there is no mechanism for cross-
Thud communication, shared memory, or metamorphic rock formations. Although
Thud has a “C-Binding Manifesto”, a lack of developer availability means that at the current time, developers must make their own mean-spirited comments towards C-APIs rather than relying on each
Thud‘s natural disdain.
Thud does not allow dependencies, ensuring that you will never encounter errors when using
Delenda Est decentralized repository managers.
Thud is not hosted at GitHub, simplifying the need to respond to trivial pull requests and user-sourced corrections. You can support
Thud by sending large envelopes of unmarked cash to my personal address.